Silence is Golden

I believe I have been buried alive by fourth grade curriculum. Is there one of those necklace thingies that I can press the little red button and whimper, "Help me! I've slipped in my pile of teacher crap and I can't get up!"?

'cuz if there is such an item, and it can be mine with just three easy payments of $19.99, I'm there. I'm in ... I'm all in!

That's is, of course, the reason I've been so quiet around these here parts lately. I've slipped in a giant puddle of "work that is sure to bury me alive." I've sprained something vital. I've ripped something necessary. I've broken something very important ... compound fractured it, people!

Perhaps one day I will have a lifer preserver within reach ...