Things My Mama Taught Me

I meant to do this .... like ... a bunch of days ago ... well before Mother's Day, but listen.  I managed to get my mom's gift out BEFORE Mother's Day, and she received it before Mother's Day, so lets not get all crazy and go over the top by actually getting a written ode to her on her actual day.  I mean, that would be so very crazy, right?

Nevertheless, I did have every intention of crafting a piece of all the things my Mama has taught me.  Here's what I am thinking:  Better late than never!  After all, her little golden nuggets of inspirational wisdom never goes out of style.

Just sayin' ...

1. You WILL be disappointed.  Count on it.  Yep, she was sooo right on this one.  People disappoint all the time.  Here's the deal, though.  She also taught me that you can let that disappointment eat at you.  Or you can turn it around and let it be a motivation to achieve.  She's soooo smart!
2. Escalators are evil. She doesn't do escalators because she believes that they are evil.  She has almost met her maker on an escalator ... as well as embarrassing herself and one of her daughters ... the eldest one ... 
3. Raw chicken can sit in the fridge for a solid week, and you can still cook it.  "Gassy chicken never hurt anyone."
4. To go with #3, "I just always said a prayer before I served it to you all. 'Please God, do not let anyone get sick from this gassy chicken'."  It's a faith-filled woman that prays over the food BEFORE she serves it!
5. Rolling your clothes up in the suitcase allows you more room to pack stuff.  This fools your father, who, every year, complains about the amount of stuff we bring with us on a trip.
6. Stop whining about it and just get to it.
7. Recycling is good!  My mom was a recycler before recycling was cool.
8. Reading takes you to places you can never go in real life.  She treated/treats a visit to the public library like a religious experience.  It was always sacred ground.  In fact, having a library card was soooo important to me, that when I moved here from Michigan almost seven years ago, that was the first place I visited here in Frankfort!
9. Pray without ceasing.
10. Homemade is ALWAYS best.
11. Never make a dessert from a box.  In our family, that is just plain against religion.  Ann and I never knew there were such things as boxed brownie mixes until we were way too old.  
12. Kill 'em with kindness.
13. When the going gets rough, fall to your knees and pray.  
14. Clean sheets make a world of difference in terms of a good night's sleep.
15. Nice young ladies don't use foul language.  Oops!  I might not have always followed this rule very well.  
16. Nice young ladies don't belch out loud.
17. Be kind to those around you.
18. Respect those in positions of supervision.  
19. Follow directions.  Unless they suggest you doing something immoral or illegal, you need to do as you were asked.
20. Flowers make you happy.  
21. A little wine for thy stomach's sake ... or thy soul's sake ... or just to save your sanity.