Monday, July 22, 2013

Accountability # ... I've Lost Count

I could go ahead and put the vital statistics up here on this page, but honestly, it's not changed....not all that much, at least.

I am what you call a Weight Loss Dud.

It's true.

For about a good six month run, I was rocking and rolling ... okay, maybe not rocking and rolling, but I was losing. Sorta ... and for some reason, that is super difficult for me and this crazy body I have.

And then The Foot Issue hit, and I couldn't walk ... or exercise ... or even stand on it for any length of time, and the weight came back on.  Not all if it, but enough of it.

And I've been fighting to lose even 5 pounds ever since.

I have tried everything ... short of just stopping eating ... and nothing.

I am wondering if shock treatment might help ...

...or having my jaw wired shut ...

....or a diet of cat food ...

....or celery sticks for life ...

I am just tired of being the fat girl ...  it's just no fun.

Why yes, I am having a pity party for myself, but you will be happy to know that I am not eating cake at this pity party, so I consider it a small victory.

And yes, I know, I should be happy that I am healthy and walking and taking in air and all that good stuff, and I do enjoy all those things, don't get me wrong, but dang!  I would give anything to be just 40 pounds lighter.

And before you get on your high horse, and start telling me that it takes a long time, back that horse up.  I KNOW that.  I've been working on this for two years, and I don't need your reminder. Really, I don.t 

And I don't need your suggestion of doctors to visit or tests to have run or the suggestions of diseases and ailments I might have or the crazy diets I should try or the things I should cut out or the things I should add or any of the other myriad of stuff you are going to shovel my way.  Frankly, I am really tired of all the suggestions and helpful encouragement.  Right now, I would just like to wallow. 

Tomorrow, I will figure out my next plan of attack. 

Today, just allow me the opportunity to wallow.


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