Sunday, May 07, 2017

LISTENING TO WHO LISTENS

You know those friends you have?  Those one in a million friends?  The ones who are willing to call you on your crap but turn around and point out all those things you thought were faults but were really virtues all along?

I'm lucky to have a few friends like that ... people I can trust with my craziest dreams ... and my scariest nightmares.

I've been struggling this past week.  Really struggling. I woke up this morning feeling weighted down  under the immensity of the struggle.  I texted a friend, one I knew would understand the struggle.  It's been her struggle as well. During the course of the text conversation, I said, "I want to do it all and perfectly, and if I can't, then I give up."

She responded, "Makes sense. But you don't really quit anything ... other than maybe taking care of yourself."

Huh!  I've never really thought about that before.  I see myself as a big quitter.  So, I said, "I don't? I feel like I've given up on everything."

Her reply rocked me. "You haven't.  You pretty much accomplish everything you set your mind to."

I am not sure why, but we get things into our heads, and it takes something close to a nuclear bomb to remove it from it's cozy spot in our heads.  I see myself as something completely different (and often with much more of a negative spin) than the people around me, especially those that know me and love me.

Why is it that we have so much difficulty seeing ourselves through the lens of others?  And why is the lens we use so very critical?

And why are we using lenses anyway?

I suppose if I knew the answer to these questions, I wouldn't be struggling like I am ...




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