Under quarantine

It's stomach flu season at school, and I've literally been witnessing them drop like flies. I've also used two containers full of Clorox wipes and almost an entire can of Lysol on my classroom this past week. Plus, as a fun preventative measure on my part, I've consumed 6 glasses of wine in the course of the week -- taking from the Bible, "A little wine for thy stomach's sake."

I went to see Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Part 1 last night with my friend Tabby. I consumed my fair share of greasy popcorn and another goodly portion of Chickfila's greasy chicken nuggets (soooooooo good, but woweee, the grease!). At 11:41 p.m., I woke up with the worst stomach issues, and I remember thinking, "Here we go! I'm a goner ... I'm yet another statistic in my bug-ridden school right now ... all that Lysol for naught."

But then, magically, I went back to sleep, and the only thing I can think of is that I'm not that young whipper snapper anymore that can consume large portions of not-so-good-for-you-food and bounce back, fresh as the new fallen snow. Nope. I'm that middle-aged fart that can barely eat an apple without dealing with some gastric fall-out of said apple.

Either way, I'm quarantining myself in the house until further notice. I've been jonesing a morning in my pjs for a while now ...