This is a biggie for me.

I suspect it is for everyone.

The thing of it is, if I trust you enough to tell you the things closest to my heart, I sorta expect that you will do the same for me.

So, when you lie to me ... even fib a little ... omit all the details ... hide the truth from me ... you lose me, and I'm going to be honest here. You lose me for good.

I know, I know.  I am called to forgiveness.  I am called to show grace.

Thing of it is, that stuff is just plain hard. That trust has been broken. You couldn't find it in your heart to show me the common decency to be just plain honest with me. Straight up honest. I'm not sure what you want me to do with that now.

I will slap a smile on my face. I will attempt to be cordial (lets be honest here ... kindness isn't what I want to exude in these particular situations), but bring you back into my inner circle? Share that degree of closeness we once shared?

Nope. That's gone.  Maybe forever.

I've watched people I know and love journey through ugly breaches of trust. They've come out the other side better for it. Stronger.

I am in awe of that journey. I'm not sure why I find it such a struggle, but I do.


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