PET PSYCHOTHERAPY
Maddie the Cat is a bit psychotic. I am blaming this on the fact that, as a little kitten, she was summarily abandoned and is now dealing with the far-reaching effects of the gross neglect.
This is how I am rationalizing and justifying her very bizarre behaviour.
One particular behaviour has to do with smells. One of Maddie's triggers is strong scents, and, let me just say, she is not at all discerning on the scent. The stronger the scent, the more insane and erratic her behaviour becomes.
Case in point ... my dad sent some cotton swabs soaked in his cologne, thinking that the minute she smelled them, she would start hissing at them, mainly because she can't stand the ground my father walks upon. On the contrary, the minute she got a whiff, Maddie started ROLLING ON THE SWABS, DROOLING ON THE SWABS, AND BITING THE SWABS ... a similar reaction to a cat with catnip.
Now, the last time I checked, Calvin Klein doesn't use catnip as an ingredient in any of his colognes. Please, correct me if I am wrong.
Case in point ... #2 ... Scrub Free Shower Spray. Maddie will come from parts unknown when I've sprayed that in the tub and shower. It takes all that is within me to beat her away from the shower and out of the bathroom. Most days, I need to shut the door and then deal with her throwing herself against the door in a very persistent attempt to gain entry into the room with the toxic chemicals. Given the opportunity, she would roll in that, I dare say!
Case in point ... #3 ... I've thrown my back out ... badly! Yesterday, I spent the day with an ICY HOT Patch on my lower back. In fact, I went to bed with it on ... only to be awakened in the middle of the night, lying on my stomach, with a cat rolling and biting on my lower back and buttocks! The ICY HOT Patch does, indeed, smell.
None of the three aforementioned items contain catnip ... I've checked. This leads me to only one conclusion:
This is how I am rationalizing and justifying her very bizarre behaviour.
One particular behaviour has to do with smells. One of Maddie's triggers is strong scents, and, let me just say, she is not at all discerning on the scent. The stronger the scent, the more insane and erratic her behaviour becomes.
Case in point ... my dad sent some cotton swabs soaked in his cologne, thinking that the minute she smelled them, she would start hissing at them, mainly because she can't stand the ground my father walks upon. On the contrary, the minute she got a whiff, Maddie started ROLLING ON THE SWABS, DROOLING ON THE SWABS, AND BITING THE SWABS ... a similar reaction to a cat with catnip.
Now, the last time I checked, Calvin Klein doesn't use catnip as an ingredient in any of his colognes. Please, correct me if I am wrong.
Case in point ... #2 ... Scrub Free Shower Spray. Maddie will come from parts unknown when I've sprayed that in the tub and shower. It takes all that is within me to beat her away from the shower and out of the bathroom. Most days, I need to shut the door and then deal with her throwing herself against the door in a very persistent attempt to gain entry into the room with the toxic chemicals. Given the opportunity, she would roll in that, I dare say!
Case in point ... #3 ... I've thrown my back out ... badly! Yesterday, I spent the day with an ICY HOT Patch on my lower back. In fact, I went to bed with it on ... only to be awakened in the middle of the night, lying on my stomach, with a cat rolling and biting on my lower back and buttocks! The ICY HOT Patch does, indeed, smell.
None of the three aforementioned items contain catnip ... I've checked. This leads me to only one conclusion:
My cat is out of her ever-loving mind and needs to seek some sort of psychiatric treatment, IMMEDIATELY!
Comments
NeeCee