JOB FAIRS .. FISH OUT OF WATER

I attended a job fair today at a local zoo ... I was a fish out of water.

Walking into the building, I quickly realized that I was the "what's wrong" in a "what's wrong with this picture" practice. The median age in the room (taking out those folks already employed by the zoo) was 17. I was the oldest job seeker in the room. In statistical terms, had this all been plotted on a line plot, I would have been considered an outlier ... an anomaly. The only other folks older than myself were the parents that had driven their teenagers there.

I also felt very over dressed in my slacks, turtleneck sweater and jacket. What the job fair ad failed to announce was that it was apparently casual dress ... "quite all right to look like you just rolled out of bed" should have been printed in small print at the bottom of the ad -- or maybe it was, and my 34 year-old eyes just missed it.

The employee took my application and practically laughed in my face as she loudly announced that the dollar amount per hour that I requested wasn't even close to the actual amount they were paying. "Your application won't even be looked at if you keep that amount there. Scribble it out and write open."

Snickers from the 16 year-old rubbing the sleep from her eyes just to my left. I can't tell whether she brushed her teeth, but she looked as though she slept in her clothes. As if!

The employee continued to scan my application. "Well, we are not interviewing for any of these positions today. So, I'll take this, if you're done scribbling that out (referring to the salary line), and someone will be in touch."

So, I crawled back into my gas guzzler and headed back home ... a 35 minute drive and countless precious gallons of gas, to again sort over my unemployment fate and try to figure out if I will ever again be part of the functioning parts of society.

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