Things that have made me squeal, "ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!"

1. It now costs $6.15 to send a certified letter ... across town.
2. While we're on the subject of the United Postal Service, shall I mention that if I would like the convenience of changing my address via the Internet, that convenience now costs me $1.00, which the USPS will gladly charge to my credit card. ONE DOLLAR! NO THANK YOU! I much prefer the inconvenience of standing in line for a half an hour and smelling some one's body odor AND get that whole, enviable experience for free!
3. My credit union does not "do" certified checks [insert snobby, nasally voice here]. Thankfully, cashier's checks trump certified checks. Otherwise, I was going to be forced to promise certain unsavory things to another bank in order to get a certified check for my closing tomorrow.
4. Apparently, I need to bring everything short of a blood sample to prove my new address and permanent residence when I go to change it on my driver's license tomorrow. Hmmm ... back in Michigan, the Secretary of State's office was always all, "Mmmm, all righty. Fill this out and sign that." Nope. Not here in Kentucky. Apparently, in Kentucky, you've got to prove 6 degrees of separation from Kevin Bacon. Oooooh ... I can't wait to stand in THAT line!
5. I forgot to ask my mortgage guy who the cashier's check should be made out to ... for some reason that never entered my mind as important. Really!? With every thing else going on in my life right now, you want me to think?

I know this will all be a funny string of stories to be told at a cocktail party (because I get invited to those ALL OF THE TIME), but right now, it feels as though my head is going to explode.