That word?


Someone in the ivory tower of government has decided to shut down a part of I 64 to do some bridge work. I'm not complaining because I sure don't want to have bridge collapse or anything like that. However, shutting down I 64 means that they have to reroute traffic THROUGH Frankfort. This translates into: "Send 'em down the EAST-WEST CONNECTOR, folks!"

The East-West Connector is exactly that ... a road that connects the eastern portion of town to the western portion of town. What this means is that a BAGILLION and one cars and trucks are now laboriously motoring down the connector on any given day during any given time of that any given day.

Now, motoring implies one is actually MOVING, when in actuality, it is more like a slow meandering marked by a violent stomping of the brakes, every half second. I made the silly mistake of trying to get to my bank on Friday -- its one and only branch situated right on the corner of E-W CONNECTOR and HELL. It wasn't fun.

All of the locals are aware of this traffic snafu, and, so, they are dutifully altering their routes. This is all well and good EXCEPT when I am trying to get home after work, and your altered route comes in direct contact with my getting home ... as was the case today.

Okay, I will give you the fact that I chose to leave at the exact same time that ALL the state employees were heading off for home ... do try to avoid that time of day like the plague! However, getting stuck behind the man hell-bent on following the speed limit for COVERED WAGONS sort of sours a mood quickly.

Seriously, people! It SAYS 35 miles per hour! Let's try to keep up!

It also didn't help that I'd spent an entire day -- actually my second day -- in a building where the outdoor temperature was ACTUALLY warmer than inside. Yes, I did have the heat on so high and at such a rate of speed that my eyeballs did, in fact, begin to adhere to the insides of my eyelids. HOWEVER, this should have IN NO WAY impeded my ability to get home.

And yet, I was impeded!

And while we're on the subject of ANNOYING-THE-CRAP-OF-ME people in their cars, the lady that drives by me with the NEW MOM AND BABY ON BOARD sign ... I have a few choice words for her:
  1. Honestly, while I'm thrilled that yet one more couple has figured out how to procreate, I really don't care that you are a new mother. Really. My life will go on ...
  2. You've been driving by me with that sign stuck in your window for months! You have ceased to become NEW any longer!
  3. Am I supposed to start following the SPEED LIMIT FOR COVERED WAGONS upon visual contact of your dumb little sign? Because if so, you might want to do some self-analysis of your own driving abilities. I mean, flying by me like a bat out of hell, doesn't necessarily exude CAREFUL, WATCHFUL driving.
  4. Does being a new mom give you more of a right on the roadway? Or are you just warning us that you are operating a heavy piece of machinery on little to no sleep? Just wondering ...

I think I need a good, stiff drink ...


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