SANTA CLAUS HAS COME TO TOWN

On Saturday, I went to Versailles to join Ann, my sister, in watching the Versailles Christmas Parade. I was particularly interested in seeing how a southern small-town does Christmas parades after witnessing many, MANY northern small-town Christmas parades.

They had a variety of things that were the same and a few things that were different. Different, for instance, was the lack of an entire fleet of trucking company semis that usually make their way down our hometown streets ... incessantly blaring their horns every five feet, scaring the crap out of every living thing lining those streets! They had a few less monster, mud-bogging trucks (and a few more muscle cars with weird hydraulic whoop-te-do's).

The same, though, were the county snow removal trucks that powered their way slowly down Versailles Main Street, bedecked in Christmas wreaths and lights. Calhoun County Road Commission does the same thing. It's actually rather funny to see grown men get all excited about decorating the heck out of a big dump truck. That's true Christmas spirit.

The Woodford County trucks got all the way to where Ann and I were standing, before the driver in the truck in front, for some unknown reason, hit the button that makes the snow blade crash to the cement ... sending Ann and I shooting two feet straight into the air.

"Well," shouts my sister in startled annoyance. "That's why no one down here is prepared for snow. They scrape their snow blades along raw cement! A snow blade won't shovel anything when you do that!"

And there you have it folks! Never try to shovel cement.

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