CHOLESTEROL KITTY
Years from now, when Maddie the Cat finally lands in Cat Purgatory -- I say years from now because she is so crusty and cussed, she's going to do her all level best to live forever, just to try to cook my goose ...
Years from now, when Maddie the Cat finally lands in Cat Purgatory, it will be discovered that she lived with and died from HIGH cholesterol. The emphasis on the word high was intentional, I assure you, ladies and gentlemen.
In my time as a pet owner, I pride myself on NOT feeding my animals table scraps. When Sadie the Dog was alive, she received only healthy table scraps like lettuce ribs and the butt-end of carrots. To her dying days, she would KILL for lettuce ribs. It was my father that turned her on to the finer points of the dining table, much to the rest of the family's annoyance. But that's a story for another time ...
Maddie, beyond kitty treats, really hasn't ever received anything other than a tiny piece of cheese here or there, and because of this fact, she ABSOLUTELY, POSITIVELY REFUSES to lick out any tuna fish can I've EVER opened ... OUT-RIGHT REFUSAL, ladies and gentlemen. If you have ever been a cat owner, you understand how truly remarkable (and not in a good way), this really is.
However, Maddie will mow over even the strongest, sturdiest beast to get her paws upon a bit of grease. The cat loses her mind! She goes to a higher plane of obnoxious wonder. It is a sight to behold, I'm telling you!
The very first time I brought McDonald's french fries into my home was the day I unleashed the Pandora's Box of ugly where my cat and cholesterol are concerned. She practically beat Sadie back for rights to the fry container, and every time I lifted a fry to my lips, she would take her paw and try to pull my fingers toward her mouth, and then, as it got closer, snatch it out of my fingers with her bared-kitten teeth! I ended up tearing off bits of fry and handing to her. That cat could, and still does, EAT. HER. WEIGHT. IN. FRIES.
This obsession with grease extends to potato chips, and she is a connoisseur. Pringles are her favorite, and, really, who can blame her. I've got to hand it to the feline, she knows a good chip!
The other day, I was eating a handful of chips left over from a dinner with the parental units. I don't usually have chips in the house, because if I did, I would eat them all in one sitting ....
That or I would fight my cat for the right to eat them all in one sitting ...
So, there I sat, contentedly eating chips in front of the TV, and Maddie sprinted toward me, full speed ahead, from out of no where! I had to put my body between her and the chips, just to keep them from being pummeled at full cat-trample!
There were a few tense moments, but I can assure everyone reading this, the chips were saved!
So, there we sat, contentedly nibbling on chips in front of the TV, and somehow, I wondered if it was a good idea to perhaps mention this little issue with her vet the next time we were visiting him ...
Probably not ...
Years from now, when Maddie the Cat finally lands in Cat Purgatory, it will be discovered that she lived with and died from HIGH cholesterol. The emphasis on the word high was intentional, I assure you, ladies and gentlemen.
In my time as a pet owner, I pride myself on NOT feeding my animals table scraps. When Sadie the Dog was alive, she received only healthy table scraps like lettuce ribs and the butt-end of carrots. To her dying days, she would KILL for lettuce ribs. It was my father that turned her on to the finer points of the dining table, much to the rest of the family's annoyance. But that's a story for another time ...
Maddie, beyond kitty treats, really hasn't ever received anything other than a tiny piece of cheese here or there, and because of this fact, she ABSOLUTELY, POSITIVELY REFUSES to lick out any tuna fish can I've EVER opened ... OUT-RIGHT REFUSAL, ladies and gentlemen. If you have ever been a cat owner, you understand how truly remarkable (and not in a good way), this really is.
However, Maddie will mow over even the strongest, sturdiest beast to get her paws upon a bit of grease. The cat loses her mind! She goes to a higher plane of obnoxious wonder. It is a sight to behold, I'm telling you!
The very first time I brought McDonald's french fries into my home was the day I unleashed the Pandora's Box of ugly where my cat and cholesterol are concerned. She practically beat Sadie back for rights to the fry container, and every time I lifted a fry to my lips, she would take her paw and try to pull my fingers toward her mouth, and then, as it got closer, snatch it out of my fingers with her bared-kitten teeth! I ended up tearing off bits of fry and handing to her. That cat could, and still does, EAT. HER. WEIGHT. IN. FRIES.
This obsession with grease extends to potato chips, and she is a connoisseur. Pringles are her favorite, and, really, who can blame her. I've got to hand it to the feline, she knows a good chip!
The other day, I was eating a handful of chips left over from a dinner with the parental units. I don't usually have chips in the house, because if I did, I would eat them all in one sitting ....
That or I would fight my cat for the right to eat them all in one sitting ...
So, there I sat, contentedly eating chips in front of the TV, and Maddie sprinted toward me, full speed ahead, from out of no where! I had to put my body between her and the chips, just to keep them from being pummeled at full cat-trample!
There were a few tense moments, but I can assure everyone reading this, the chips were saved!
So, there we sat, contentedly nibbling on chips in front of the TV, and somehow, I wondered if it was a good idea to perhaps mention this little issue with her vet the next time we were visiting him ...
Probably not ...
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