PLEASE PUT IT BACK WHEN YOU'RE DONE WITH IT
So I was talking to my good buddy, Carrie, the other day. Carrie is the mommy to little Jack Monster, who, if I've counted on my fingers correctly, is somewhere in the vicinity of 4 months old.
As is usually the case, our conversations run the gammit, mainly, because my ADHD brain doesn't stay on anything more than five seconds. During the course of my disjointed monologue, Carrie says to me:
"Dude, I've lost all the baby weight plus 15 pounds, and I STILL can't get into my pre-pregnancy jeans."
I was all like, "Dude! That's awesome!"
Carrie replied, "Yeah, but I still can't get into my jeans."
Later on, I was chatting with my workout buddy, Lori, who has (again, if I've counted on my fingers correctly) a 13-month old Ella. Lori looked at me, while I'm telling the story, and nodded her head in sad agreement.
"Yep, it's true. Things just don't go back in the same location they were before you pushed that precious little bundle out." She sighed heavily. "Yep, I finally gave my jeans away to my younger sister. It was just too depressing."
I then made the mistake of telling my book club. With the exception of Christy and Erin, EVERYONE there had given birth at least once, and they all nodded solemnly. "Yep, it's a fact," they all seemed to say in unison.
Okay, uummmm ...THIS IS NOT A PRETTY PICTURE YOU ARE PAINTING FOR THIS SINGLE, CHILDLESS CHIC HERE!!! I mean, seriously! Let's not all push and shove our way to the front of that line!
Good glory ... things aren't in the right spot on my body to begin with, but at least I have a snowball's chance in H E double hockey sticks of at least getting them in close proximity to where they USED to be!
As is usually the case, our conversations run the gammit, mainly, because my ADHD brain doesn't stay on anything more than five seconds. During the course of my disjointed monologue, Carrie says to me:
"Dude, I've lost all the baby weight plus 15 pounds, and I STILL can't get into my pre-pregnancy jeans."
I was all like, "Dude! That's awesome!"
Carrie replied, "Yeah, but I still can't get into my jeans."
Later on, I was chatting with my workout buddy, Lori, who has (again, if I've counted on my fingers correctly) a 13-month old Ella. Lori looked at me, while I'm telling the story, and nodded her head in sad agreement.
"Yep, it's true. Things just don't go back in the same location they were before you pushed that precious little bundle out." She sighed heavily. "Yep, I finally gave my jeans away to my younger sister. It was just too depressing."
I then made the mistake of telling my book club. With the exception of Christy and Erin, EVERYONE there had given birth at least once, and they all nodded solemnly. "Yep, it's a fact," they all seemed to say in unison.
Okay, uummmm ...THIS IS NOT A PRETTY PICTURE YOU ARE PAINTING FOR THIS SINGLE, CHILDLESS CHIC HERE!!! I mean, seriously! Let's not all push and shove our way to the front of that line!
Good glory ... things aren't in the right spot on my body to begin with, but at least I have a snowball's chance in H E double hockey sticks of at least getting them in close proximity to where they USED to be!
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