I teach fourth grade ... this fact hasn't bypassed any of you, I know. Yet, still I thought I'd restate that fact for the story I'm about to tell.
You see, last Thursday was GYM day, and that's a BIG FREAKIN' DEAL when you're a fourth grader. I lined the kiddos up and started them down the hallway when Greg (not his real name), whipped around and said, "OH! I forgot something. Can I go back to my locker?"
The kid was wearing Crocs (I'm not even going to begin to tell you how many different kinds of wrong THAT is). So, I assumed he was going back for tennis shoes. When he jogged down to the rest of us, he was still wearing those stupid Crocs.
"I forgot to put on my deodorant," he whispered to me.
"Oh," I nod.
"Miss Murray, why do you need deodorant for personal hygiene?"
"Well, it keeps you from being stinky." That Fourth Grade Funk is a killer!
"But why does that matter?" Greg asked as we met Mr. Howard, our gym teacher at the door. Now, Mr. Howard is a "fresh out of college" guy, and he's adorable, and I was relatively sure, he would have some experience with what I was about to tell Greg.
"Well, Greg," I said, as I put my hand on his shoulder. "It matters because girls just don't like stinky boys. Just ask Mr. Howard."
"What's that?" Mr. Howard says.
"Mr. Howard, isn't it true? Girls just don't like stinky boys and that's why boys should wear deodorant?"
Mr. Howard nodded his head solemnly. "Dude. It's true. Girls DO NOT like stinky boys."
And that, my friends, is another arrow in my quiver of GRIME FIGHTING IN THE FOURTH GRADE.